Grocery Store Attempt

I go to the Pak N Save at 40th and San Pablo to shop, this time my boyfriend
was wandering about the store when this guy asked if he could get my phone
number at the checkout counter. It was really sad because this guy stank of
drink and it was barely noon.

Submitted by Monica in Oakland

harassment from San Luis Obispo

On March 13, 2007, in broad daylight, I walked the final block to my car alone, after leaving a friend. We were walking to our cars in downtown SLO in broad daylight after leaving our job at the Court. We have had numerous training sessions in personal safety etc due to the nature of our job. I was aware if my surroundings and felt confident I was not followed to my car. However, as I climbed into my van and was setting down my purse with my right hand and simultaneously reaching for the door with my left, a man suddenly appeared blocking me from closing my door. I did not have the presence of mind to take a photo, but I got a real good description of him as his face was very close.

He said “I don’t want to embarrass you but I noticed when you were walking that your slip was showing”. I paused and froze, trying to assess if this was some really lame pick up line or if her was just really stupid to approach a woman at her car, alone and discuss her undergarments. He stood leaning in to the door of my car with his cell phone (black and silver flip phone) open and near his right ear as if he had been talking to someone. As he spoke he held it away from his head. He then said “It’s a very beautiful slip, do you mind if I ask you about it?” Again, I was still frozen and thinking what my options were, realizing he had me trapped. He then stumbled over his words a bit and said”…I’d like to get one for my girlfriend…is it a half slip or full slip”. I looked at as if he were nuts, told him “half slip” and he backed up a little as I lunged for my car door, shut it, locked it and looked in the review mirror. He had disappeared. I started my car & backed up out of the parking space as fast as I could and looked around and saw him no where to be found. He had vanished as quickly as he had appeared. Here is his description:

Medium Build, 5’11ish, 25-30 yrs old, blond/sandy blond short hair (crew cut), blue eyes, looked as if he had been out in the sun, fair skin, no jewelry or piercings, looked “clean-cut” and at first I thought he was a college student. He wore a dark blue/black t-shirt and possibly jeans (but I didn’t get a good look as he was leaning into the car). He had no noticeable accent or anything else distinctive.

I reported the incident to the local police and my job. After sharing this with my friends and coworkers we discovered other people had similar experiences. An article posted today in the Tribune, the local San Luis Obispo county paper, where they have picked up on our name for him “the slip stalker”.

I wanted to log this on your site because the details in the article don’t include the man’s description and leave out some of the details that I think show the man has become bolder since his other incidents.


Submitted by Cindy in San Luis Obispo

Creepy

he looks at every girl's ass. no joke.

Submitted by Miss Electric in Oakland

Halloween 2006

On Halloween 2006, my boyfriend and friend and I were
unlocking our bikes outside of a party when I felt a hand on my ass.
Before I could even turn around to see who had done it, my boyfriend
had pushed the man down on the ground so hard that he knocked over one
or two of his friends (it was a group of four guys) and hit his head
on the sidewalk.

The guy who had been pushed threw a can at my boyfriend's head and
started to come towards to fight, but his friends grabbed him and had
to drag him all the way across the street. I grabbed my heavy bike
lock, and holding it like a weapon, yelled at him that he wasn't
allowed to fucking touch me. Meanwhile my friend used her cell phone
to call the cops (who didn't answer). The guy made like he was going
to come back across the street, but we quickly rode away.

Fuck all these guys.

Submitted by Megan in San Francisco

Old Story

A few years ago when I was still new to the city, my mother
was visiting. The two of us and one man were the only ones riding the
bus one night at about 9pm downtown. At the last stop on the line, the
man walked up to the front of the bus, then turned around and came to
the rear exit where we were waiting to get off. As the door opened he
pushed past me "hurrying to get off the bus", and rubbed his crotch
roughly against my body.

I was horrified, but I couldn't think of an appropriate response that
wouldn't have made my mother flip out. (She is dreadfully worried
about me and my safety, past the point I think mothers usually take
it.) Instead, I turned and scowled at him as he went down the BART
stairs. He actually SMILED at me as I shot him my nastiest look.

The worst part about the story was the very next day we passed him on
the street in an entirely different part of town. I thought I would
never have to see him again, and seeing him the very next day felt
like someone punching me in the gut. He smiled at me again, and I've
seriously never been as paralyzed with anger/fear. I was so pissed
that I missed a second opportunity to call him an asshole.

One of the worst

This was one of the worst encounters I had ever met. This man saw me and my three friends walking towards BART. He immediately stopped in front of us to tell us how good we looked, and asked us what race we all were. We obviously were rushing to BART and as we went down the stairs, ignoring him. He put out his hands from side to side and basically stood on front of us so it as if we were trapped. I told him if he didn't move, I'd rip him a new asshole. Him being drunk responded with "Who are you calling a asshole? I'm not an asshole. I'm being nice to you girls.". As we were going through the BART terminals, he was drunkenly trying to hop over them. I took the picture. How could I not? He was being ridiculous. He then yelled at us until we went all the way to the train. It was fucking annoying. If you go to 24th and Mission, watch out for this asshole.

Submitted by Miss Electric in San Francisco.

Report these guys!

I too have been harassed by guys at construction sites, driving company trucks, doing landscaping, or otherwise in the middle of their workday. Get their description, note where you are and the time, get a license plate if possible, and CALL THE EMPLOYER AND FOLLOW UP WITH A LETTER. Tell them you will never hire them, will tell all your friends not to hire them (if that's an appropriate threat), but mostly be sure to let the management know that they are responsible for the illegal actions of their employees while on the job, and that their employee has just committed assault (assault can be verbal, battery is a physical encounter). Get the jerks fired, and make the companies clean up the act of all the guys they hire. USE YOUR POWER!

Submitted by Mary Beth in the Bay Area

Have a minute? Take a Great Survey!

I love your Web site! I love it so much that my Master's thesis on street harassment is in great part focusing on Web sites like the HollaBack chapters and the Street Harassment Project.

In addition to reading through all of the postings, part of my research includes an online anonymous survey about people's experiences with street harassment and visiting/using the Web sites.

Street Harassment Survey

Thanks! Holly from Washington DC.

Responses to ruin THEIR day

I have found that a great response to guys exposing themselves, leering at you, or making cat calls is to yell "You should be ashamed of that tiny little thing!" Wait till you see their faces! (However, they also get pretty pissed.)

If you want them to slink away, instead of YOU having to, you can SHOUT: "Stop harassing me!" It makes everybody look (good protection), and makes THEM embarrassed instead of us.

Submitted by Mary Beth in the Bay Area

What kind of American am I?

At 7 in the morning, after I've already been working for an hour, a
construction worker calls out "Hey baby." I didn't have my camera, so I flipped
him off double-time and told him "Fuck you."
He says "That's all I get? Fuck you? What kind of American are you?"
What the hell kind of question is that? How much more stereotypical can
you be? How does it feel to be the most typical turd of all time? Another
beautiful day tainted by an ass.

Submitted by Monica in Oakland.

BART

Dude: Hey baby. What'cho doin' tonight?
Me: Obviously not taking a nap with you on bart.


This guy totally sucked.

Bus Tactics

Taking the 14 in San Francisco is no easy task. Not even at 1 o'clock in the afternoon. This guy here will perversely call you 'mommy' until you want to kick him in the face, or get on another bus. Watch out ladies. Don't sit across from this one.

Submitted by Miss Electric in Oakland.

One more

These guys will cat-call anyone with legs. This construction site at 66th and Shattuck in Oakland will get you down, no matter what time of the day it is. Women beware - 10am is never too early for these dudes.

Submitted by Miss Electric in Oakland.

Perv near parrot hangout on Filbert steps

On a beautiful Sunday several months ago after brunching at Il Forniao in Levi Plaza, my girlfriend and I decided to take a walk up the Filbert steps nearby to see the parrots and work off some calories. I’m very familiar with the area and the birds as I live in the city and have done freelance work with clients in this area for over 10 years.

At the top of the steps is a large tree that the flock was hanging out in. We’re smiling and watching them as other folks are coming and going enjoying the birds as well. At one point, my girlfriend and I were the only ones there. It’s then that we notice a guy standing in his open apartment window, naked. At first he walked by the window and I thought...whoops. Ok. Dude in his apartment not noticing he is visible to others. Then we both notice that not only is he naked, he is sporting a boner and stands in the window, leaning on the sill. This is no accident. Wonderful. Just what I want after brunch. He proceeds to stand there gazing at us with his boner fully visible. We try to ignore and enjoy the day, the view and the parrots.

He steps partially behind a yellow curtain or something and starts jacking off. The boner was gone when he steps over to the window again. We decided we had had enough and proceed to leave. My girlfriend shouts up...”Do you do this often?” in an attempt to shame him. As we head down the stairs, we wave and give him the finger.

Well, last Sunday we had brunch at Fog City and take a walk up the stairs to work it off and check for parrots. No parrots, but dickhead was walking around naked again despite the fact that 2 elderly gents were at the top near the tree looking at the view and a neighbor one house over was in his garden working. Apparently, this is what he likes to do on Sunday. We didn’t give him any notice this time. Since others were around, we’re thinking this guy just likes to jerk off in public in front of anyone, male or female. Yegads.

Since this dude lives there, it can’t be the first (or second) time this has happened. It’s clearly a habit. He lives on the second floor of the blue building. He MUST be doing this to neighbors or they surely MUST be seeing some of this. Why haven’t they called cops? Next time we have brunch down there, we’re bringing the digital camera and capturing this asshole on film since neither of us has a camera cell phone.

I’m also going to look into what the police can do about this despite the fact that he’s in his own home. There have to be some laws around standing there flogging it in your window when you are visible to others. Moms with little kids go up there, tourists galore go up there, to see the parrots since all the... Ahem... ‘exposure’ due to the movie “Wild Parrots of Telegraph Hill”. Not exactly a boon to tourism.

Be warned if you go up there to see the parrots. You’re going to see a whole lot more.

the Pee Peeper

Invasion of privacy, to the maximum.

Now this didn't directly happen to me, but it did a co-worker. A hard working co-worker who was just trying to pee.

We had a store meeting at the Holiday Inn on Van Ness in SF. As I was setting up for a employee vote, my friend comes running out of the bathroom, interrupting the Muzak playing in the lobby. "THERE IS A PERVERT IN THE BATHROOM! I JUST WENT INTO TO PEE AND HE JUMPS OUT AND STARTS WHACKING OFF!" We all look confused and pause for a moment. I think to myself "this can't be true" so I grab the funniest guy I know, another co-worker. I say to him "Hey....go to the bathroom. Just do it. Knock on the last stall..." So he does without question. He comes out hysterical. Indeed there was a perv whacking off to whoever would come into the bathroom. How long does he spend there in that hotel lobby bathroom a day I wonder?

We can't even take a piss in peace anymore....

Submitted by Miss Electric from Oakland

dirty man

Richard is a dirty old man in Martinez. He snoops through everyone's garbage, and if a woman gets too close to him he snatches at her breasts. Most women say he laughs while he runs away. He follows young teen girls in his truck and leers at them with his tongue hanging out, but has harrassed women in their 70's and 80's as well.

Submitted by Sandy in Martinez, CA

Letter from the Editor

Thank you to everyone who had responded so positively to this site. It has been an overwhelming experience to read the praise from men and women alike, and to see the posts come in as more and more of you holla back.

I posted here the harassment stories that I received while out of town, and also some of the letters of thanks. I find it reassuring that there is a vast network of all types of people who find this site a much-needed space for discussion.

If you missed the story in the Chronicle, please take a look at it here.

There is also a podcast to go along with it here.

Keep up the good work and keep spreading the word about Hollaback!

02/09/07 south of market

so friday night i've been out with the girls drinking and dancing south of market. it's 2 am and i'm tired and decide to take off and find a cab home. the rain is coming down so i pull the hood of my puffy white coat over my head. i'm dressed like a skank because i wanted to, because it was girls' night out, and because i look good.
which some old man insists on pointing out to me as i walk down the street checking up and down for cabs, my hand out whenever one drives by. he keeps up for a little while even though i'm ignoring him and then at some point gets braver and comes closer to me. at which point i turn, look at him, and say "you're STILL talking? i am SO not interested." that rudeness apparently works because he disappears.

then at the corner i find a male-female couple standing under an umbrella scanning the streets too, so i ask them if they want to share a cab. they're cool about it and start feeling protective of me when some other fool walks right up and tries to put his arm around me. we just cross to another corner and i call a preset number on my phone for desoto/yellow cab/whoever's answering, since we're not having any luck waiting.

now some people would say that i shouldn't have:
1) been dressed like that
2) walked down mission street @ 5th
3) been out alone at 2 am
4) had 3 drinks and attitude

and maybe i got lucky.
but a guy could do each of those things and not have the expectation of being whistled at or accosted.

i know i could have been safer: next time i'll call a cab and wait at the club in my hot little skirt and fishnets. then i'll just get eyed by the bouncers and patrons instead.

but i still feel righteous and appreciate that being rude will shut down some unwanted attention.

and i'm getting a cell phone with a camera so i can photo these motherfuckers for your website.

thanks!

Submitted by C in San Francisco.

Man grabs ass in bookstore...

This man at Barnes & Noble in El Cerrito said "Now that is a perfect ass" as
I looked at art books by the restroom. I turned and said "What the fuck did
you say?" "Nothing, I was just thinking aloud," he said with a grin. "Well,
I know you weren't talking me." "No, just thinking out loud." I decided
seconds after relieving myself of his presence that I wanted a picture. But
he kept disappearing! I knew he was up to something, so I kept trying to
find him. Seconds later I heard "SECURITY, THIS MAN JUST GRABBED ME!" I knew
it was him and followed him and took a blurry pic as he headed for the exit,
"I just brushed up against you, asshole!" security stopped him and the cops
got called, but the guy got away anyways. The security guard told me it
happens all the time.
Advice to everyone, I know we've been told to get loud when these things
happen, but if you act like nothing happened then make sure the cops get
called so the guy doesn't have the chance to escape you will be very
satisfied to press charges on these fuckers.

Submitted by Monica in Oakland

Laney Masturbator (again)

Well, the fore mentioned Laney Masturbator came back again, did the same
thing, same computer and everything. I slowly packed my things like nothing
was happening and went into the other part of the math lab. My math teacher,
who was there last time also, called security. We waited for a couple
minutes and before we knew it the cops came and dragged his ass out in
cuffs! I filled out some paperwork, the cop told me that he lifted the guys
shirt up and saw his boner (blegh!). Also, the guy was on probation AND had
already been 86ed from the computer labs at Laney. He confessed and signed a
statement moments later, now he will have a restraining order for all
Peralta colleges. The police also described similar situations where a man
used to just stand by the Laney pool and the teacher would ask him to leave
(wrong move! ALWAYS CALL SECURITY/POLICE!) until one day he actually reached
through the fence and tried to grab a girl. Moral of story: These guys start
slow and work their way up.

Submitted by Monica in Oakland