So, I was sitting there eating my torta when some guy asked to see my glasses, expecting me to pleasantly give up MY EYES so that he could fuck around with my black frames on his ugly, drunk-ass face. any who. i said, fifty bucks in my hand would give him a try at my glasses (a.k.a. my eyes). being a stubborn asshole, he kept trying to bargain/be clever... both of which were nauseating... and all I wanted to do was eat. And he kept bothering me.
I realize that this isn't sexual harassment and it wasn't violent or dangerous, but I do think it speaks to the way that men expect women to participate and entertain their banter (and stupidity). We as women, are expected to respond and not reject such harassment, especially when it is this kind of harassment that has no obvious harm, and when we do, were seen as anal, prude, uptight bitches.
Anyways, just thought I would email this because a woman saw all this happening and then gave me the little card with the website on it. Being a feminist, womens studies major who is already critical of such gendered power dynamics, I wanted to say thank you because I think you guys are doing great work and opening up an important space of dialogue.
Submitted by Mai in San Francisco.
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2 comments:
I realize that this isn't sexual harassment and it wasn't violent or dangerous,
It's not straight up sexual harassment per se, but on the other hand, I doubt he would've approached you and bothered you if you had been male. Quite possibly he thought he was being flirty/cute/charming.
Also, seriously - people who ask to try on glasses irritate the fuck out of me! The glasses aren't decorative, they're there because you can't see without them.
I had a similar situation on the 5 Fulton the other day. Some drunk guy kept trying to talk to me, asking me what day it was, if I was going to work, was I a nurse, did I work for the city. Finally, I remembered that I didn't have to sit there and be polite. I rolled my eyes, got up, and went to stand closer to the front of the bus. I agree -- it wasn't explicit sexual harassment, but he sure as hell wouldn't be doing it if I were a dude.
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